Wednesday, August 12, 2009

home is the prairie

i'm having trouble remembering why i decided to come here. i think maybe it was for my friends. or the city? i'm not really sure.

when i left last summer i was surprised to find that houston had almost become more home than lincoln. all my friends and favorite restaurants were here. plus the driving. oh, i loved the driving. all that was left for me in nebraska was my mom, ivannacone and a handful of friends. not nearly enough to satisfy my adventurous soul. i couldn't possibly imagine staying there for more than just a visit.

but somewhere along the way, something changed, as things inevitably do, and my assumptions about myself and my life started to go out the window (a fact i have also found to be inevitable). and, as it turns out, i kind of really like nebraska. there is something about it that just feels good. there is something in the landscape that speaks to my soul and makes me happy. and you know what, i kind of like lincoln. i like that people are friendly. i like knowing my way around. i like that we have things like movies on the green and pinewood bowl and jazz in june. they make me happy.

and while i still can't believe that i can say this, i could maybe even live there one day. not now and not forever. i've got a lot of traveling to do. but you know what, somewhere down the line, it might be a good place to raise a family. when i get to that stage in my life, of course.

now, it's fair to note that i am probably suffering, in some part, from the-grass-is-always-greener syndrome. so far things in houston haven't quite been...ideal. this isn't quite the job i had envisioned for myself when i decided to come here. nor is our house quite what i was expecting, though it is adorable. and, of course, we have the TAKS. the Texas Assessment of Knowledge and Skills, also known as the bane of my existence and the reason i never wanted to teach in texas. yet, somehow, here i am.

i know that things will calm down. as i get my classroom in order and we finish unpacking our house, i will feel less and less unsettled. and soon i will have some time to rediscover all of the things i loved about houston. who knows, months from now i may never want to leave again.

for now, though i am representin' for you, nebraska, and sending much love northward. you've wormed your way into my soul and i'm fairly certain that no matter where i go, a part of me will always find comfort and solace in your wide open arms.

1 comment:

Unknown said...

Aw shucks, Kim. Hope things get brighter. I agree with about Lincoln, obviously (seems like a good town to me) but I bet you'll find the bright sopts in this decision very soon. You are getting a very wide and varied experience as a teacher - think of all of this s honing your skills as you progress toward master-teacher-dom!